Emotions · Funny · Life · Relationships · Uncategorized

I Signed Up For OkCupid For One Week And This Is What Happened

In a post I wrote on April 4, 2016 called “Relationshopping: Why Online Dating Is A Cop Out“, I basically gave my stance on why I don’t think online dating is the best way to go.

Well, a couple weeks ago, I made my big move from Los Angeles, California to Sioux City, Iowa. To say I was saddened and underwent culture shock is an understatement. For the first time ever, I was completely alone. I didn’t know anyone and it was the first time in my life where I experienced what real “adulting” feels like… to live on my own, take care of all my finances without help from my parents, and take care of everything because no one was anywhere within 1000 miles to help. Under pressure and stress, I caved.

I signed up for OkCupid.

To my defense, I was essentially doing it just to talk to some people and see what there is to do around this new city I was now to call home. I wanted to see if there was anyone on the online hemisphere that I could explore with. I never once thought to myself that I wanted a relationship with anyone I ended up talking to because my beliefs regarding online dating still hold true. I was just lonely and in need of purely platonic companionship.

After being registered for the site for one week, let me tell you the embarrassing things that went down.

To put things simply, my beliefs in why online dating is terrible were only reassured when I got messages that were completely vulgar, sad, inappropriate, disgusting, and just flat out hilarious.

Example number one:

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Excuse me? Dafuq? Who starts out a conversation like that? It amazes me how confident people feel when they are distanced behind a screen.

Example number two:

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Okay, so this was kind of funny. But no thank you.

Example number three:

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I don’t even know what this means.

Example number four:

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Lol. Please say yes to what? This just sounds way too desperate. Next!

Example number five:

Screen Shot 2016-06-05 at 10.56.15 AM

So to some people, there may not be anything wrong with this. But first off, I HATE when someone approaches me and says “Hey, beautiful.” Don’t enjoy it in person, don’t enjoy it online. We don’t know each other like that. Secondly, I am a grammar freak. If you don’t know the difference between to, too and two, you’re out of luck with me, my friend.

Example number six:

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Um thanks? But what in the hell is your profile pic?

Example number seven:

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Screen Shot 2016-06-05 at 11.02.13 AM


Okay, so I actually responded to this guy because his intro wasn’t AS BAD as the other people who messaged me… but he didn’t have a profile pic, and he essentially had nothing on his page, so I let him know that. But then he responds with actually putting up a pic for like five seconds then calling himself ugly? Lack of confidence is an automatic no.

To put it simply, I deleted my account. I couldn’t take more than a week of messages and interactions like this. My experience with “online dating” sites hasn’t changed, and I don’t think it ever will. There’s way too many creeps out there and I would rather sit at home and watch the paint dry on my wall than to entertain another conversation with people like this online. And what I’ve posted to this blog is not even half of the weird messages, these were just the ones that really stuck out to me.

Oh, internet, how you thrive yet fail at connecting people quickly and efficiently.


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